There was a time when Savio Nsereko, then of Germany Under-21s, was deemed to be worth £9 million's worth of investment when West Ham jemmied him from Brescia's fold back in 2009 - such was his perceived potential.
(N.B. the West Ham board are currently investigating the shifty-looking deal with Brescia, presumably on 'trading standards' grounds)
The Ugandan-born striker lasted just six short months at Upton Park, starting one Premier League game, before being moved on to Fiorentina where his career followed a similar downward projection - making absolutely zippo appearances for La Viola's first string in three years, finding himself farmed out on loan no less than five times around clubs in Serie B, Bulgaria and Romania before finally leaving for third-tier German outfit SpVgg Unterhaching in 2012, who released him after three months.
It has been widely reported that Nsereko, now 23 and without a club, has struggled with bouts of depression and mental illness throughout his short professional career (he once had Interpol out looking for him after going AWOL from training during his short time at Italian second division side Juve Stabia), which puts a decidedly desperate tinge to his latest escapade.
Skip forward a couple of months and now Nsereko is currently due to stand trial in Germany after being arrested in Thailand in October on perjury charges after it was alleged he'd contacted his family in Germany claiming he'd been abducted and asking for €3,000 ($3,818) in ransom.
Police, suspicious at the unusually low ransom demand, investigated the claims only for it to come to light that Nsereko had fabricated the whole bloody thing.
Someone get this guy some help.